Our Ugly House

Home Improvement

Hunger Games

The last few weeks have been less project oriented and more get our sh*t out of boxes so we can live a semi normal life again. Originally the misplaced necessities led to an ultra fun game titled: “Have you seen my this, do you know where my this is, please for the love of all things holy help me find this?” (That was dripping with sarcasm). After living out of boxes and eating take out nightly, we decided to take a tiny break on the updates and just get things slightly settled. We also cleared the carport of shag carpet and demo debris. So much fun. Really. (I am lying).





Another insane thing to note: I got married about 2 months ago, and bought a house about 1 1/2 months ago, and I understand those are both very adult things. But do you know what is more adult!? Do you???? I will tell you. Buying brand new, grown up as bleep APPLIANCES! Shiny, stainless steel, never been used by some shady craigslist character appliances. The Home Depot Black Friday sale started last week and the deals are like, crazy. I demanded Curtis and I go in and buy every last thing we could fit into our new kitchen. In my haste I forgot the important detail of getting the floor finished in the kitchen before we lug in a bajillion pounds of baller cooking status equipment. That means between now and the weekend before Thanksgiving we need to procure tile, cute tile, and lay tile.

Just like that we are back in the Hunger Games of kitchen remodeling. (See what I did there? Hunger Games? Kitchen? I am just a kick).


Those floors though

It’s 6:30am and I am standing in Portland airport Starbucks line silently debating if they will judge my potential order of two large coffees, a sausage breakfast sando, and maybe like, two cream cheese breakfast pastries. I’m bloody exhausted from working on the house until midnight last night. Buying a house was on the goals list, so don’t mistake my total lack of current enthusiasm for me not be totally stoked to be a home owner. The truth is I just didn’t realize it would be so much hard work. I would look on Pinterest and see a million DIY’s that seemed so easy… and do it yourself-able. And then you do them, and you live in a house full of sheet rock dust, and stain fumes, and sometimes you fight with your husband over things like which paint color to go with. “White Shoulders” or “Luna Moon”. (Also, who the F names paint? “Luna Moon”??? Doesn’t that just basically mean “Moon Moon”?!?) …. and then you get tired. OK I AM TIRED AND IT IS HARD, GET OFF MY BACK!!! I am going to chug a couple coffees. In the mean time look at all the pretty here:

IMG_2174The wall came down… Goodbye wall, we don’t need you anymore. And all that lovely brown junk? Peel and stick carpet residue. How do you get it off? Scrape until you can’t feel your fingers… It’s awesome!

IMG_2973Fingers = numb


IMG_2203Ok, it sucked to scrape off… but damn son. Look at that floor!





One weekend down

We had our first full weekend of house work, and homey don’t play…. we got some serious stuff done. We have a week to do some of the big work before we need to move from our rental house into the new house. I like to set lofty, totally unattainable goals for myself because I like grey hair (it’s in style, right?).

This weekend we finished painting all the walls in the living room/dining room, minus the ceiling and wood paneling, both of which need a final coat and they will be finished. I have some amazing friends who came out and gifted their time and labor to help make that shiz a reality. I opted for a black accent wall that turned out pretty sexy… I love the dark color. Note my incredibly safe and high tech ladder! Seriously kids, don’t try this at home.



The walls went from mint green, and forest green floral wall paper to a perfect shade of white. “White Shoulders” to be exact was the paint color (sounds like dandruff shampoo to me). Then the demo began. Down came the wall separating the living room from the kitchen. Hello open floor plan!! Also, I have amazing parents. You will be seeing a lot of them around these parts. How cute are my dad and Curtis, tearing down walls!? Oh, and we exposed the old furnace brick chimney in the kitchen. Meow!






Next steps:

– Finish painting ceilings.
– Crawl around on my hands and knees and remove every damn staple holding down the miles of carpet pad.
– Scrape glued carpet pad.
– Drink
– Hang curtains or bed sheet to hide from creepy neighbor!




Holy bleep. We own a house!

Today was seriously the most intense day. I met with our realtor to obtain the KEYS TO OUR HOUSE! Thats’s right. With these keys, we be wed, to a house. Forever… or until we pay it off/sell it. Let me reiterate. A bank, or some institution deemed us worthy (after the most painful torture month ever) to own a house. And suddenly, we have keys. I REPEAT. WE HAVE KEYS. Ok, I am flying on adrenaline, oil based wall primer, and like 3 beers. Don’t judge my over excessive caps.

Night one we primed all the wood paneling in the living room, and spackled the seams on the wallpaper. Notice the main wall in the back, the one with the door to the kitchen? We are tearing that wall down. Why we decided to spackle the entire thing? You know…. because we are dumb. Please excuse my crap pictures, I promise I will bring my good camera tomorrow.


Spackle be done!



Finally. I have been stressed about the floors. There are gorgeous hardwoods in the living room/dining room under that mess of a pepto pink carpet. When we pulled up a corner of the carpet in the bedroom there was linoleum under the shag nightmare. Who puts freaking linoleum in a bedroom? We were told by the house inspector it was very like the linuliom had asbestos under it and to leave it be. So the options: put hardwoods or carpet over it. Being the stubborn, I don’t like hearing no kind of girl I am, I decided to tear up the carpet just to see. HOLY CRAP! There are hardwoods under there you guys, and one weird 2″ strip of linoleum around the entire perimeter of the room. Best discovery yet.




3 beers later and we have a new sink

First things first… You should know this about me. I like to drink. Not in the, “I have a problem sort of way”, but more in the “why yes, I will have a few more sort of way”. Frankly, getting through a DIY wedding, and purchasing our first house has led to quite a few “yes please, I will have a few or 10 more”.

This last week has been our staycation honeymoon filled with packing, old horror movies, and lots of brunch. I finally made it outside to meet a good friend for beers/lunch today. Just a few blocks from our watering hole of choice is the most amazing recycled building materials store: The ReBuilding Center. This place is a DIYer’s dream filled with old wood, vintage doors/windows, an entire warehouse of bathroom sinks, and don’t even get me started on the lighting section. But I digress…. Ok, 3 beers and a delish veggie burger later I convinced my most bestest man friend Mario to accompany me on a journey through the ReBuilding Center. I hadn’t even made it through the front door when a gleaming hunk of white ceramic caught my eye. I rushed over and guarded this potential treasure like a dragon protects it’s baby egg. This indeed was a farmhouse sink and it was going to be mine. This sink was seriously my dream minus the dirt and a chip on the corner. I tracked down a staff member and haggled the price to $40. FORTY FREAKING DOLLARS.

I took my little babe zone sink home, sprayed her off on the lawn…. and voila. Baller sink on a budget. My kitchen status just leveled up, big time. Can’t wait to get her into the new house. Woooooo!


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